Sheriff's Wife: Battered Spouse or Independent Woman?
Prosecutors will try to portray Eliana Lopez as suffering from battered woman syndrome
She told two neighbors that her husband, San Francisco Sheriff Ross Mirkarimi, had physically abused her.
She showed them what court documents describe as "the big, dark-purple bruise on her upper right bicep."
But Eliana Lopez refused to talk to police who wanted to question her about the incident.
Last week, Lopez told a judge that she was a strong, independent woman who did not fear her husband and was in no danger from him.
“I am 36 years old,” Lopez said. “I’ve been independent since I was 20 years old.”
Lopez told reporters after that hearing that the domestic violence charges are part of "a political game" by people who are trying to destroy her husband.
Prosecutors contend that Lopez's seemingly contradictory statements are evidence that has battered woman syndrome, and they plan to call a Berkeley Law lecturer, Nancy Lemon, to make that part of their case during Mirkarimi's trial, which is set to begin Feb. 24.
Mirkarimi switched lawyers on Wednesday. His new attorney, Lidia Stiglich, said in an email, "We whole-heartedly dispute" the prosecution's depiction of her client and Lopez. "Mrs. Lopez is not a battered woman, period," Stiglich wrote.
Cheryl Wallace, Lopez's attorney, did not immediately respond to a request for comment.
In court documents filed Monday, prosecutors said Lopez's actions, including her refusal to talk with police, "are typical of" domestic abuse victims. And they said that the incident exemplifies the "Cycle of Violence" and "Power and Control dynamics" that characterize domestic abuse cases.
The cycle, prosecutors wrote, begins with a period of increased tension, followed by an act of violence, which is then followed by a period of "forgiveness-seeking" on the part of an abuser. In the Mirkarimi case, they said, Lopez gave a "truthful account of the abuse," which Lopez said happened in front of the couple's 2-year-old son, Theo, "to her neighbors whom she trusts. Once the Defendant apologized and told her not to tell anyone, he whisks her away on a road trip with the son."
Prosecutors cite an email Lopez wrote to one of her neighbors during that trip to Monterey: "I'm realizing how serious it is and I have to be very smart to protect Theo and myself."
According to prosecutors, Lopez's decision to recant the allegations she made to her neighbors is not surprising. They cite testimony from an expert witness in another case who said that "eighty percent of women" who are assaulted later change their stories.
In the court papers, prosecutors wrote that a domestic violence victim "is most likely to relate an incident truthfully within 24 to 48 hours after an incident," explaining that victims tend to become less willing to cooperate with law enforcement as time passes because the "batterer or the batterer's family" may have convinced the victim to change his or her story.
Prosecutors wrote that Lopez "has not denied that [Mirkarimi] physically abused her." And, they said, because Mirkarimi told Lopez that he is "powerful," the pressure on her "to recant, minimize, and outright deny that anything happened is extreme."
Stiglich, Mirkarimi's attorney, vigorously disagreed with those arguments.
Prosecutors also want to use Lemon's testimony to shed light on Mirkarimi's behavior. "The public image of any accused, particularly of an elected public official, is often quite the opposite" of the defendant's private behavior, they wrote.
"[T]he private, dark side of an accused can co-exist with the groomed, public image established among colleagues and peers," the documents say. "An expert in domestic violence would illuminate how these two sides are not inconsistent with one another, like two sides of a coin."
Stiglich said the issues raised in the prosecution's motion "may have relevance in other cases before the court," but "they have absolutely no relevance here."
"Sheriff Mirkarimi is a loving husband, a doting father, a tireless public servant and a very decent person," she wrote.
Mirkarimi faces three misdemeanor charges: domestic violence battery, child endangerment and dissuading a witness. The last charge stems from the allegations that Mirkarimi tried to convince Lopez not talk to anyone about their argument.
“That dissuasion, in fact, occurred and was in statements he made,” prosecutor Elizabeth Aguilar-Tarchi said during a hearing Thursday. "We’re not in the 1950s where things are brushed under the rug.”






eight arms
Was Ivory Madison practicing law without a license?
R T
Just because you talk to someone about an issue who happens to have graduated from law school, does not mean that you have created an attorney client relationship or that the person is acting as a client. Lawyers are people too! Scary I know.
eight arms
You don't know what was said.
R T
And you do?
eight arms
Ask Madison how helpless Lopez is after Lopez sues her into financial oblivion.
Robert Montgomery
If your neighbor came to you, scared and bruised, and told you her husband was abusive (you've been hearing the yelling for a long time) and showed you some bruises. What would you do?
eight arms
I'd tell her to call the police.
I would not gather evidence for a future custody battle. Unless I was her lawyer.
R T
Good luck with that. Not much of a case there at all.
eight arms
Thanks for the legal advice.
"What constitutes the “practice of law” in California is an issue which is necessarily central to any discussion of enforcement of UPL laws. Neither the Business and Professions Code, nor any other California statute, comprehensively defines the practice of law for all purposes. Over the years this has raised questions about the precise parameters of the legal profession in California. But California’s Supreme Court and courts of appeals have knowingly crafted a broad definition of law practice suited to grow with the profession."
"Thus California today defines law practice as providing “legal advice and legal instrument and contract preparation, whether or not these subjects were rendered in the course of litigation.” Birbower, Montalban, Condo & Frank, P.C . v Superior Court., supra, at 128. Providing legal advice or service is a violation of the State Bar Act if done by an unlicensed person, even if the advice or service does not relate to any matter pending before a court. (Mickel v. Murphy (1957) 147 Cal.App.2d 718, 721.)
This definition of law practice is broad and non-specific.....
http://da.co.la.ca.us/pdf/UPLpublic.pdf
-- UNAUTHORIZED PRACTICE OF LAW
MANUAL FOR PROSECUTORS--
R T
And again, you know what was said?
eight arms
i know what Lopez said....
"...she was always coming to see me, calling me, coming to knock on my door, and always inviting us [to do things]," Lopez said. "One of the investigators is trying to see what's behind this."
http://blogs.sfweekly.com/thesnitch/2012/01/eliana_lopez_ross_mirkarimi_ivory_madison.php
R T
Wow sounds like a whole lot of unlicensed lawyering there, Coming over, inviting to events, even taking a child's drama class. Just like LA Law.
eight arms
If immigrant women are more subject to domestic abuse they also seem to be more subject to the unauthorized practice of law.
"...unlike many other fraud victims, UPL victims are often recently arrived or undocumented immigrants ...."
http://da.co.la.ca.us/pdf/UPLpublic.pdf
R T
So this is your new theory 8, that Ivory Madison was practicing law without a license? Interesting. Completely. Insane and delusional, but interesting nonetheless.
eight arms
There is a certain logic to the argument that if as an immigrant woman Lopez is more vulnerable to DV and requires a restraining order, it is also true that she is more vulnerable to political schemes by the long list of enemies Mirkarimi made defending normal average people against the sophisticated predators that stalk city hall.
R T
That could also explain Mirk threatening to take away the kid etc.
M L
Your eight arms embrace women with such affection.
Mary Stanford
This argument about Madison is an irrelevent smokescreen and has nothing to do with the central question: did the guy commit the crimes alleged? No one forced her to have pictures and videos taken of her injuries. She was clearly scared at the time. The fact is that immigrant women are far less inclined to report and prosecute crimes of domestic abuse, particularly those married to men in positions of influence.
eight arms
Yes but immigrant women are also more likely to be victims of practicing law without a license.
"...unlike many other fraud victims, UPL victims are often recently arrived or undocumented immigrants ...."
http://da.co.la.ca.us/pdf/UPLpublic.pdf
Helene Gelber-Lehman
Spousal conflicts are never one sided nor is abuse. Mirkarimi may have acted out physically but assuredly his wife, an obviously very saavy, manipulative and emotionally dishonest woman, may have been both abused and psychological abuser. No one will really ever know what happened between those two, but assuredly the child is the only true victim. I wouldn't want to be the judge or the child in this case. Personally, if I were the judge, I'd take the child away from both of them, if there was some safe loving family member who could take him.
After hearing the wife recant her many stories and smearing the credibility and reputation of the innocent neighbor --who the wife-herself put in the middle of this conflict, knowing of the neighbor's life-long passion for women's rights-- I wouldn't trust this wife one whit. Neither Miriarimi nor his wife should have been parents.
R T
Wow. I truly thought that in this day and age we had gotten beyond blaming the woman for the abuse inflicted by the husband. I truly do not know what went on in the Mirkirimi household. No one really does but Ross and his wife. Wait- it sure sounds like you do. But I do know that it is disgusting to lay even partial blame at the feet of his wife. If he did in fact grab her arm as it has been alleged. She IS a victim. No amount of manipulation or "psychological abuse" as you claim she has committed justifies physical abuse.
Go back to the 1950s and I really hope you are not a cop or anyone involved in law enforcement. Your opinion is just sickening.
R T
Ok- if that makes you feel better.
eight arms
ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
steve vee
Oh fkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk
steve vee
Mirk must be explosive. Even his old lawyer called him a tyrant. Really odd word choice for a lawyer. Guy needs to resign immediately. Locking your wife up after beating her? Just sick. Let's hope his days of purported "power" end soon.